There will always be someone who is better at what you do than you are. Always. So, someone is better than you. What is your point? Why do we torture ourselves constantly with questions of whether or not we are “good enough”? Better to ask the question, “Who has benefited from something I have created or a service I have provided? What have they said? How have they been touched?” Because your product or service is not art unless it has come in contact with a human being. The thing you are trying to do is find which human beings will benefit most from what you have to offer.
You can learn a lot by watching successful comedians. One thing you will notice is that all successful comedians are comfortable with who they are. They may poke fun of who they are, too short, too tall, too fat, too thin, or too average. But they capitalize not on trying to be someone else, but on being who they are really really well. Of course, we work on our craft and polish that version of who we are. But all our work is meant to polish and bring out the shine in who we are, not who we think we need to be.
As a female teacher in our church, I’ve struggled with the concept of who I am. I grew up in a big Baptist church and my pastor was a big booming Texan man with a sweet southern drawl. When I was a kid, I used to tell my parents that he sounded just like God. I am a tiny, unassuming California girl who talks fast and giggles too much. Ladies like me mostly did the singing, not the preaching. Without a lot of female examples, I often struggle to find my voice— or to have permission that my voice is an acceptable and worthy voice. I have a lot to say, but I sometimes have a hard time saying it through my persona. I remember the story of Little Women when Josephine March wrote a book, but she went under a male sounding name in order to sell her book and for people to take her writing seriously. These days it is much harder to maintain that anonymity, and when you speak, it is impossible.
All these thoughts run through my head, but then I come to my senses and I look at the people who have been affected by something I have said or something I have written. One young lady in our church commented that even after going to a great mega-church for many years, she never realized, until coming to our church, that she could actually participate in healing the sick or ministering to others in power. I have to conclude that this has something (but not everything) to do with the fact that as leaders my husband and I are who we are. We don’t put on false personas or inflate ourselves in such a way that no one else can attain. We try to be true to who we are. And when we are true to who we are, others are finally liberated to become who they are.
The Public Speaker podcast by Lisa B. Marshall made me aware that most people are 6 times more likely to act on information presented by a man as opposed to what they hear from a woman. Now, this statistic does not attempt to explain the reason for such a phenomenon. But, I cannot help but think that the reason for this is at least in part because of the ways that we women have so effectively talked ourselves out of the importance of who we are.
I admit that I continually find myself making internal apologies about who I am. I have to ask myself some hard questions. Why do I hesitate to share who I am with the world? Why do I constantly question if who I am is enough? The reality is that if I tried to become my big Texan pastor, others might never see the real me. And other regular people would maybe bask in the sun of my perfect performance, but in never seeing the authentic me, they never see what they are capable of. My connection would be lost for the sake of a false image. Which is better? To reach 10 people in a real and lasting way than 10 thousand people in a shallow way that makes no lasting impact on their lives? To loosely quote that great old movie, It Should Happen to You, “It is better for your name to stand for something on one block than for your name to stand for nothing all over the world.” That being said, the truth is that you if you are who you are, you are incidentally likely to reach more people than if you try to be someone else. You will also have a lot more fun in the process.
At the end of the day, your work is really not about you. Your work and my work is about the connections we make with others. Because it is not about you, you need to be you. Others need the you that God created. All our work and all our pursuits should be not masking that you, but bringing that you to life.
Thank you http://heytheregood-looking.blogspot.com for the image!
Leading by Design 